According to both the notes that I have down, and the facebook ‘relationship’ status.
today is my 1 year anniversary with E.
Well, 1 year since he said he loved me.
And he said it first. It kinda slipped out one night and then a few days went past and he said it again.
It was only after that second time that I could even start to admit to myself that it was true. I had fallen in love with him.
And what a year it’s been. I’ve quit smoking, I’ve quit my job, I’ve lost weight, I’ve gained it back. Mom’s had cancer and finished her chemo and is healthy again. My brother’s been up, my brother’s been down. I’ve been in debt, I’ve gotten out of debt.
And through it all, E has been there. Always at my side, always the support that I needed, and just as much as I needed, and never more than I asked for. Always just right.
We met for the first time in january, when he flew into Washington DC specifically to meet me and spend a week together.
It was the most amazing week of my life. That first kiss. That first time we held hands. It was as though our bodies were supposed to fit like that. It was as though we had never been apart, even though it was the first time we’d met.
We were apart from January until september, and then the magic was there again. Like no time had passed.
And now, the next big step. I move to be with him in February.
But tonight, tonight is the first night that he said he loved me. A year ago. The first night that one of us cracked.
Thank god for that.
I love you, E.
I could fill this with flowery words and poetic prose to fill volumes of Dickinson and Bradstreet and Milton. But there is nothing that could equal the emotions that I feel. Those words don’t exist. So I leave it simply at this.
I love you.